The Rooster firmly believes that when I ask for his opinion on something, I’ve already made 
up my mind and am just looking for him to validate my decision.
Maybe he’s right. But I’m not so sure..
I grew up an only child so most of my life, my thought processing and decision-making was done alone. I would mull over the possibilities, weigh the pros and cons, consider the outcomes of different scenarios and finally come to my decision. But if I was really stumped, I would ask for an opinion and I would really want the truth. And if you asked me for mine, I would be honest.
I think there are people who ask for opinions because they’re digging for compliments. For instance, they ask what you think of their outfit, because they’re anticipating that your response is going to be “it looks great!”. I mean, really – who is going to come out and say anything else?
But what if that outfit really looks hideous? I would like to think that if I were sporting something that was nothing short of hideous, at the very least my husband or one of my best friends would jump in and let me know.
I think we were married a few years before I finally explained to the Rooster that when it comes to outfits, he was doing me no favors by giving me the obligatory “you look great” response. It was his duty to make sure that I didn’t walk out of the house looking like crap – if I couldn’t count on him to be honest, who could I count on?
Then there are the folks that can’t make a move without asking everyone’s opinion. It’s as though they are completely void of making decisions for themselves. These folks aren’t looking for an opinion, they’re looking for you to make the decision for them so that they don’t have to deal with the pressure of whether or not they made the right decision or not. I know people who are EXHAUSTING because all they do is ask for people’s opinions. And when they don’t like what they hear, they ask someone else and keep asking until they finally get the answer that they like or want.
Why anyone asks for opinions is beyond me. Steve’s right in the sense that 90% of the time, I HAVE made up my mind already. But in my defense, his opinion means a lot to me – otherwise I wouldn’t ask. I rarely ask someone who’s not close to me for their opinion unless I’m standing in Kohl’s trying to determine if it’s this one or that one. And even then, I take it with a grain of salt.
What’s your opinion on opinions? No really – I want to know… it’s not like I know the answer or anything and I promise to keep my opinions to myself..
Kristen
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What is funny is that, at my house, I get opinions I didn’t ask for!! LOL!! But if I did ask someone for their opinion, I would certainly hope that they give me an honest one.
Brigett – unsolicited opinions are a post in itself. Might make the grade for next week
Kristen Daukas recently posted..Can I Get Your Opinion?
I have always thought, that, although I’m not very good at it, there is a pleasant way to give the hardest news.
We don’t have to say, “OMG Look at your gigantic backside!” We can say, “You know the other jeans work better on you.”
Maggie S. recently posted..Mask
Falls under the rule of “it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it”, right? Thanks for stopping by!!
Kristen Daukas recently posted..Social Media and the Death of Social Meetings
Um… I prefer the slightly sugar-coated approach when delivering and receiving opinions. “It’s a good start, but maybe it’d be better if we…” I try and shoot for helpful, not hurtful for the most part.
Salty and sweet maybe?
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