Until about 3 years ago.
Then, seemingly overnight I became a wicked, nasty person at least once a month. How is it that I managed to escape my entire life without suffering from PMS and then KABAM! out of nowhere not only do I have PMS but it’s wicked nasty?
I’m talking “batten down the hatches, thar she blows” nasty.
“Not safe for children and animals” nasty.
This is the pay off for being a “female” for 44 years? PMS after 30 years of not having it?
This is my reward for bringing 3 wonderful human beings into the world to hopefully continue the human race? And have you seen my girls? They ain’t bad looking so it’s not like I went and put bad mojo into the gene pool.
I had no idea what was happening to me until one day I was talking with one of my oldest friends (tenure, not age… ) and as girl talk often does, it turned to “what the hell is going on with ____________” type conversations. So of course I mention this sudden onslaught of PMS and she’s like “OHMAHGOD!! Me, too!!!” and then tells me that it could actually be peri-menopause symptoms and not pre-menstrual.
But wait… it gets better…
Apparently peri-menopause can start TEN YEARS before you actually go thru menopause.
So let me get this crap straight… it’s not bad enough that women have suffered with Pre-Menstrual-Syndrome pretty much our entire lives but now we get the added bonus of Pre-menopause at the end of our “glory years”. And adding insult to injury.. we get to experience BOTH versions of PMS at the same time?
I won’t bore (or scare) you with the details/symptoms, but suffice it to say that it’s like your “younger” PMS on steroids.
With this news, I have decided that Eve really was a piece of work, Adam should be shot and apparently everyone in my life needs to take cover for a few years. Because this storm could take a long time to pass.